Saturday, November 13, 2010

You're so cool

So my sisters all have blogs except for Sarah, but I'm sure she'll keep one when she gets older. So I love reading my sisters' blogs. They are hilarious! in fact, read them yourself! Here are the links to KellyHeather, and Julie's blogs :)

So anyway.

I've been blessed with a great family. I lovee my family, but today I am gonna talk about Heather.

Heather is my older sister by twoish years. She is tiny tiny, loves to drive fast, has a fascination with cowboys, is gonna be a teacher, and has one of the sharpest tongues I have ever seen.

I don't mean she runs around screaming at people, or just being mean. Not at all, because in addition to the above qualities Heather is nice, sensible, hard-working, and too occupied with her social life and studies to have time to be a mean old hag.

So listen, I was reading a post by her. Its called "I throw my pants up in the air sometimes" and its about planning. So lemme talk a moment about the beauty of having a blog. You can write whatever you want. It's your blog. And you don't have to read blogs you don't like, and people don't have to read your blog if they don't like it. I had a conversation the other day with this girl, and she told me that my blog offended her (it was the one about driving). She informed me that she would no longer be reading my blog, and that she was glad she had told me this, because now she wouldn't have to worry about pretending to like my blog whenever we talked about it.

....Whatever. At first I was hesitant about including that story in here, because I was like, maybe writing this and posting it on the internet will hurt her feelings? And then I realized she would never read it!

But the reason I included that fascinating story in here is to illustrate my point. If you don't like something, then don't read it, don't watch it, don't eat it, don't play with it, don't wear it, whatever.

There's this guy that reads Heather's blog, and he hates it. He is always writing these rude little comments on them about how stupid Heather is, or how conceited, or how much better and more hardworking men are than women. Sometimes, I think he should just be gay, he thinks guys are so great.

So anyway. Usually Heather doesn't respond to him, but he was being a real jerk the last time, so she gave him a piece of her mind and handed his words back to him on a platter, all ready to be eaten up.

I was so astoundingly proud of her. I think Heather is hilarious, and she was just like bam. Shut your mouth. Here are a couple of my favorite parts....

"it's okay if you want to hate on my major, because i'll make less money than you, so you win, but i'm going to be teaching your kids, so i win. "

"every morning, i spend a max of 15 minutes getting ready. this includes hair, makeup, getting dressed, and breakfast. sorry that's such an exorbitant amount of time to spend in front of the mirror. also, you benefit from it so not really sure why this bothers you so much. (although probably you only benefit from this to the extent that you get to see pretty girls, because you sound pretty bitter so i'm just gonna go ahead and guess that you aren't gettin any.)"

"for my next blog, i'm probably going to blog about the cowardice of annonymity on the internet."

I have a letter for anonymous....

Dear Anonymous,
First of all I want to express my jealousy. It must be nice to have so much free time (perhaps due to lack of work? or a social life?). I wish I could spend waste my time as much as you do surfing the web, looking for things I don't like, and then writing scathing reviews about said things. But I guess I just can't have it all.
You are so incredibly creative, because there aren't a thousand other "Anonymous"-es out there. But you have to keep up the mystery factor, I understand, because your sexist and demeaning words are just so darn irresitable that if had you let your identity loose we might just hunt you down for the sole purpose of hearing you say all these clever and intelligent comments in person.
You spend a lot of the time talking about who is better or more important, so let's try that out, shalllll we? Who is better, the pathetically rude person who spends his friday nights reading the blogs of fabulous girls and then writing about how stupid and idiotic the author is as well as the rest of her gender, or the girl with the fabulous life who is out having fun with her friends (because she has them) and who doesn't see the point in wasting her time doing what you consider a worthy endeavor, aka being mean?
......I thought so.
So here's a message for you, Anonymous; Stop commenting on my sister's blog, or better yet, keep it coming, because your ignorance and the fact that you're going to end up bitter and alone (or happily gay??) is quite frankly hilarious to me.
~ Anonymous (ohh aren't I cool?)


  1. oh thanks girl! you just said everything that i was thinking, and you said it perfectly! i love how you and julie are so defensive of me to annonymous haha. you are the best sisters i could have asked for!